Chaos in Vegas After Clown Show

Las Vegas, NV. -- Audience members were thrilled until they weren’t yesterday during the new Vegas show “Clowning Around.” Eyewitness testimony claims at least 250 clowns exited a small green car on stage before security ended the show and escorted audience members out.

This marks the second show this week in which a Vegas show has ended unexpectedly. Monday’s “Prime Time Mime” show continues to face silent backlash after they hypnotized audience members who were then unable to break out of the mime-like trance, leaving them and investigators speechless. Show officials declined to comment but did publish a statement encouraging affected individuals to audition for their mime-troupe.

The flow of clowns has remained steady since the show last night, obstructing law enforcement from reaching the car, which is still assumed to be on stage. Civilians have set up shelters to retreat from the clown-and-mime-infested streets and are encouraged to stock up on canned goods, ear plugs, and Circus-B-Gone™ to stay safe and sane during what many have dubbed “the Clownpacalypse.”

Not everyone, however, views the situation negatively. “[Clowns] have scared the tourists away, and life is actually much more pleasant - they never block the sidewalks to take pictures or ask for directions,” says a local. “I’ll also probably never have to pay for a clown show again.”

Another local, affected by the “Prime Time Mime” incident, offered a written statement: “Many clowns never speak in character and, with them, I have finally found my new home.”

Optimistic officials look forward to reopening one of the most famous destinations in the world once the situation is contained. In the meantime, they encourage tourists and locals alike to stream future shows from home or watch sports instead.